PPC Wiki

Unger is a D&D v.3.5 half-elf barbarian. He is 22 years old, and very naïve in the ways of the modern world.

Appearance and Origin[]

Unger is 5'3" and weighs about 120 pounds. He wears a kilt, high moccasins, decorative collar, bracers, and not much else. He is from a small tribe that consists entirely of half-elves, which was started as a retreat by a few, and has been kept alive by new half-elves joining and providing unrelated blood. They hold territory on the outskirts of civilization, and constantly have to fight to maintain their lands. Unger ended up in the PPC when he fell into a plothole after nearly being killed by a large group of monsters during his coming-of-age challenge.

He carries a Quiver of Ehlonna, in which he stores javelins, bows, arrows, and spears. He prefers to use the javelins for distance, which of course do not have the same range as bows, but being up close gets his battle rage going faster. He carries a battle axe and large wooden shield, which he can sling onto his back. He also wears a belt, which provides support for two daggers, a couple of belt pouches, and a small water skin. He keeps a few fish hooks (wrapped to prevent accidental sticks) and line, sewing needle and thread, chalk, candle, a few coins, and a small bell in one of the belt pouches, and flint, steel, and tinder in the other. He also has a bedroll, blanket, length of rope, unlit torch, and empty sack that he rolls together and ties diagonally across his back under his axe.

Personality and Characteristics[]

He is unused to technology of any kind and is still very jumpy when one of the "magic" boxes makes a sudden noise. He is still easily impressed by cigarette lighters and other simple devices. He has been introduced to modern indoor plumbing, although he might still harbor some fears of being sucked down drains.

Being a barbarian, Unger is illiterate. He does not speak English fluently. He still relies on the Universal Translator, but he is practicing. Kelok is teaching him to read and write English. He now recognizes most of the upper case letters and knows most of their primary sounds.

He is tough, strong, fast, and mostly likable. However, he has a serious lack of common sense—hence his attack on a large group of monsters. He has almost a Spidey-sense when it comes to knowing where his enemies are in relation to himself and where they are going to strike. It has helped keep him alive in the various lack-of-common-sense situations he has gotten himself into. He is very good in any wilderness situation. He can find food and water, handle animals (minis and pets love him), and ride horses very well. He is pretty good at looking scary for the benefit of his enemies, although his partner, David Kelok, is much better at it, given his Wraith appearance.

He is very energetic and enthusiastic about getting the opportunity to kill enemies. His tribe measures warriorly prowess in enemy scalps. His ready and willing attitude when it comes to killing enemies is possibly one of the reasons he was kept in the PPC, especially in light of his appreciation of fire. As of their first mission, he had started sixty-two fires in FicPsych. He started fourteen more in Medical after their second mission, and after their third mission he managed to destroy all of the furniture in the PPC Lounge with a fire.

Partner, RC, and Department[]

Unger is partnered with David Kelok, who was not amused at being called a half-orc in their initial meeting (or any of the myriad other times Unger has said it), but since that little wrinkle was sorted out, they have gotten along pretty well. This has a lot to do with the extreme patience that Kelok was gifted/cursed with in his homefic.

They are in RC 1729, which has been specially fireproofed due to Unger's fascination with fire. They started out in the Department of Floaters, but were transferred after Kelok went on their fourth assigned mission solo, while Unger was setting fire to the HQ Lounge. They have now been assigned to the All-Purpose Department, Sherlock Holmes Division. DOGA refused to take them due to Unger's illiteracy, even considering his pyromania.


  • Khazad Dym is a mini-Balrog given to Kelok and Unger as an RC-warming gift by Agent Tawaki. Khazad Dym gets along with Unger perhaps too well. He joined in on the playing-with-fire session that burned up all the Lounge furniture in early July 2010. However, he also proved himself a hero during that fiasco through his natural immunity to fire damage.
  • Homles is a mini-Hound of the Baskervilles that Kelok and Unger found in their third mission. He is a tireless, glowing, drooling, baggy-skinned little monster. He is no longer allowed in the halls of HQ unless he is wearing a collar and on a leash.

Mission Reports[]

Home: RC 1729: The Fire Pit

Partnered with Kelok[]

  • First Mission: "Devil of a Time" (NSFW/NSFB) (Sherlock Holmes)
    • In their first mission, Kelok and Unger are given a chance to prove they are ready to leave FicPsych. But they have a devil of a time when they face a Dr. Watson Stu who is better at everything than Holmes and enjoys committing extremely bloody murders.
  • Second Mission: "Turtles?" (Sherlock Holmes)
    • Injured in their first mission, Kelok and Unger are about to be sent to Medical when they are ordered to rescue Holmes and Moriarty from two Sues and their highly implausible attack turtles. Things go from bad to worse when they underestimate the speshulness of the Sues. Where did you learn the word implausible, Unger?
  • Fourth Mission: "Headaches" (Sherlock Holmes), Kelok solo
    • Kelok gets nothing but headaches first from his partner and then from a solo mission to erase public kissing during Watson's badfic death scene.
  • Second Interlude: "The PPC Presents: A Day Off"
    • When Kelok gets a day off while Unger is in Medical, he meets fellow agents, sees special features of HQ, receives a visit from a new friend, and has a chat with the Floating Hyacinth. Sounds like a good day. Of course, this is the PPC, so having "Repent, Blasphemer!" shouted at him is the least of his problems. (Unger has only minor appearances in this interlude.)
  • Seventh Mission: "All Hail the Ironic Overpower!" (NSFW) (Sherlock Holmes)
    • Kelok and Unger deal with a badfic where love equals rape and psychological torture, Kelok has a really bad day, agent-recruit David is rescued, and Unger says "All hail the Ironic Overpower!"