There are two basic types of troll: (1) real persons who go around the Internet causing trouble for fun, and (2) fictional creatures that may be encountered within Word Worlds by PPC agents.
The first kind are, for the most part, pointless and annoying, and the PPC has (thankfully) not run into too many of them, considering its anti-Suvian stance. The second kind may be either malicious entities that spawn when someone writes a trollfic, or species found naturally in various continua.
There is a sign on the Cafeteria door that reads "Don't Feed the Trolls" [1] The Watering Hole is one of the few places that will serve troll agents.
Real Person Trolls
Message Board Troll
This is a message board user who decides to spam the forum with witless, offensive, or otherwise annoying posts, threats, or multiple topics in a row for the purpose of irritating the board's members. The PPC has had a few trolls in its time, but not nearly as many as other similar forums, such as GAFF. (The latter has had to relocate three times due to trolling.) This kind of troll should not be confused with a spambot, which is a program designed to generate spam posts, linking advertisements in its e-mail or message.
One such PPC troll was Red Wolf the Weird. Another appears in this Analysis of a PPC Troll, by Tungsten Monk. Mostly, message board trolls should be ignored, although the PPC has a very hard time doing this and many Boarders seem to think that feeding the trolls (i.e. replying with witty repartee to troll posts) is entertaining.
Badfic Troll (Person)
A person who writes deliberate badfic and posts it online is a badfic troll. Most often, the person just wants to amuse him/herself by seeing how much flaming and indignation the fic can inspire as they laugh at the whole mess.
One such monstrosity was encountered and mocked on the Pirates of the Caribbean Sue Report: "What's worse than a Suefic? This!" Now, who would take the time to copy the phrase "Johnnydepp Orlandobloom rock" 229 times and post the thing online? Obviously, someone with very little else to say.
The notorious badfic author Squirrelking revealed himself as a troll in September 2009, illustrating the difficulty involved in telling the difference between a very clever troll and an incredibly bad author. It is now believed that the authors of Legendary Badfics "Celebrian" and "legolas by laura" were also trolls, though they might just be saying that to put some distance between themselves and their sordid past.
Badfic Troll (Creature)
Within the Word Worlds, trolls in their natural form are "great, lumbering, invisible, troll creatures," like malicious, sapient versions of the Benevolent Parody Clouds created by good parodies.[2] They also seem to be relatives of Sue- and slash-wraiths, since they can possess canon characters[2][3] and can occupy crash dummies if the trollfic is written in first- or second-person.[4][5] They may become visible upon exorcism, in which case they appear as a dark purple[5] or silvery[3] cloud that solidifies into a "large, muscular, thoroughly ugly troll with a small head, long arms and bloated grey body."[5] It may take on additional aspects depending on the character it has been playing.[5][3] Trolls have also been known to take on the solid form of a canon species.[6]
Real-life trolls tend to lose their power when exposed. Given that and the fact that some fantasy trolls are destroyed by the sun, it makes sense that badfic-creature trolls are vulnerable to sunlight[2] and, by extension, any sufficiently high-powered energy source, including overloaded plasma weapons[5] and fire, if it burns long enough.[4] Casting them directly into the sun naturally works a treat.[6]
If a troll misspells its own name, it produces a mini-troll,[6] just as a misspelled Sue name produces a mini-Sue. (These should not be confused with the mini-trolls of the Buffyverse.)
Badfic trolls fall under the jurisdiction of the Department of Bad Parody, Troll Division, although Department of Technical Errors[source, please!] and Floaters agents have been known to handle them when there is no other agent on call.
Canon Species
Species of troll can be found in a variety of continua. For the most part, they are big, slow, and dumb, but there are some notable exceptions to this rule. Don't stereotype!
Discworld
Trolls on the Disc are huge creatures made of rock with diamond teeth. Typically, they aren't very bright, but because their brains are made of silicon, their IQ improves exponentially in cold temperatures. They get larger and slower as they age. They tend to have rock- and mineral-based names, such as Chrysoprase, Detritus, and Ruby.
Troll culture is based largely around rocks, hitting people, and hitting people with rocks, but they can function within human society with effort. Their racial enemies are the dwarfs.
Agents Erratic and Tuff are Discworld trolls.
Harry Potter
Trolls in the Potterverse are of the big, slow, and dumb variety. They are about twelve feet tall and prodigiously strong, and their skin is very tough. Troll whiskers have magical properties.
Trolls wear loincloths and use weapons (generally big clubs), suggesting they have at least a primitive level of culture. They have a language, though it consists entirely of grunts and gestures, and is difficult for most humans to understand. In turn, trolls only understand a handful of human words. (Professor Quirrell and Barty Crouch, Sr., had a gift for communicating with them.) They tend to be violent and unpredictable, but the more intelligent ones can be trained as security guards.
Homestuck
Homestuck trolls are also known as Alternians, after their homeworld. They are basically human-shaped, but with grey skin, black hair, and horns colored like candy corn. There are also some differences in their physiology—for instance, they hatch out of eggs and begin life as grubs. Their blood comes in various colors depending on caste.
Alternian culture is complicated.
Agent Najash Lelipi is an Alternian troll.
Tolkienverse
Trolls in Middle-earth are evil creatures, created by Melkor before the First Age. Earlier trolls are more or less your standard fantasy model: big, strong, dumb, turn to stone in the sunlight. Some are capable of speech, such as the three Hill Trolls met by Bilbo in The Hobbit. The Olog-hai seen in The Lord of the Rings, which were created by Sauron, are not known to speak, but they are bigger, stronger, and not vulnerable to the sun.
World of Warcraft
Trolls in Azeroth are intelligent humanoids that may be distantly related to the world's elves. They are very tall and lanky, and sport large tusks. Varieties include jungle trolls, forest trolls, and ice trolls. They speak with a distinctive Jamaican troll accent.
Troll culture is tribal, and they are practitioners of voodoo magic.
Agent Barid is a jungle troll who is very outspoken about perceived anti-troll prejudice in Headquarters.
References
- ↑ One of Barid's stories.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 "Of Lawn Gnomes and Meatloaf" by Leelee, Meir Brin, and Saphie, Jul 21, 2003
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 "Hamburgers, Steaks, and Xenomorph Ribs" by Herr Wozzeck, Mar 29, 2012
- ↑ 4.0 4.1 "DREW PICKLES GOES TO MCDONALDS" by JulyFlame, 2008
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 5.2 5.3 5.4 "Twila The Girl Who Waz In Luv With A Vampyre" by Fish Custard, Jul 18, 2011
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 "A Troll's Tale" by Herr Wozzeck, Mar 6, 2012