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Norman Jaden is a particularly egregious replacement Stu from the Heavy Rain continuum who somehow replaced both Jason Mars and Norman Jayden while taking the role of 'Origami Killer' away from a certain other canon character. He was slain by Agents Anneli Rodriguez, Xanthus Garkaran, and Cinderella.

HistoryEdit

Norman Jaden began as Jason Ned Mars, the son of Ethan Mars. Whereas the actual Jason Mars died in his home continuum, however, Jason Ned Mars was hit by the car, which then drove all the way to Washington, DC from Philadelphia, somehow without having the driver notice there was a child who was plastered against the grill. Somehow, Jason Ned Mars survived all the way, and wound up at the Pentagon.

There, he somehow incredulously got a job with the Federal Bureau of Investigation despite only being ten years old on account of the receptionist taking pity on him. Somehow, he also got a job without having to go through the otherwise rigorous process of being recruited to the agency. He then rapidly aged 19 years in the span of two, when he became the Origami Killer (despite having no time to do so) and assigned to his own case.

He went through the motions of the game that Norman Jayden would have had to go through in an actual playthrough of Heavy Rain, creating an army of 14 minis while he was wreaking havoc on the canon with horrible spelling and terrible grammar. He made it to the Old Warehouse where he confronted Ethan by explaining his backstory, showing where Shaun Mars was, and giving Ethan a riddle to solve (which was stolen from Die Hard With A Vengeance).

ChargesEdit

As soon as Norman Jaden had given Ethan the riddle to solve, Xanthus Garkaran lost control of his temper and lunged at the replacement. He subsequently charged the replacement Stu while simultaneously beating him up. The charge list is as follows:

"Ludicrously fast pacing, severe violation of ‘show, don’t tell’, describing thought process as it works in Heavy Rain’s gameplay mechanics and not how a person would actually think, having what looks like a mid-chapter author’s note that probably wasn’t intended to be one but comes across as one anyway, having Shaun know something about what a red light district is, having a number of pointless asides, turning Shaun Mars into an ingrate over the strawberry candy, and having Ethan Mars employ teleportation in place of his blackouts!"

Xanthus was so angry by this time that he split the charge list in four parts:

"Creation of minis, making it seem like a highly publicized serial killer would rob a store, genderbending an unseen female character, having Scott Shelby be stupid enough to try to run after a thief, deviations from the game’s dialogue that make sure the following events make no sense whatsoever, making a character assume that someone is the Origami Killer just because they rob a store, having Ethan Mars know what typewriter something was written on by just looking at the text written with it, ignoring critical plot points in a retelling, extremely bad biology, and making a canon character who was supposed to die live!"

The third part, following an interruption by Cindy, goes as follows:

"Making Carter Blake an FBI agent, painfully explaining a joke, compression of dialogue in a retelling, giving Scott Shelby a child, having the Origami Killer kill babies, making the thieves in Madison’s dream ninjas for no reason, confusing the motel room numbers of Ethan and Madison, having Carter Blake hesitate at bringing in a suspect for questioning, rampant crimes against spelling and capitalization, creation of a geographical aberration, taking the game’s events outside of Philadelphia, describing an extremely narrow shaft like a hallway, gender confusion, making glass ‘cute’ you, not making Gordi Kramer sic his guards on Scott, getting Ethan to expect to get clues from failing a trial, and being inconsistent with what you do with the branching plot of the game."

And the final part, just before Xanthus sentenced the Stu to death:

"Use of the wrong ‘there’, zombifying John Sheppard, repeating a conversation without any point to it whatsoever, having redundant narration, skipping the entirety of Ethan’s fifth trial, doing… whatever that thing with the lines and periods was that was the laziest narrative gimmick in the history of lazy narrative gimmicks, extremely bad physics, extremely bad logic, giving an FBI job to a ten year old boy, aging nineteen years in the span of two, stealing the riddle from Die Hard With A Vengeance, annoying PPC agents, horrifying PPC agents, giving us the absolute stupidest plot twist ever conceived by man, and being not just a character replacement but also a Gary Stu."

DeathEdit

Upon being charged, Xanthus told Anneli to open a portal to the Reality Room. When this portal was opened, Xanthus unceremoniously tossed Norman Jaden inside, whereupon the replacement Stu aged back to 12 years old (the age the actual Jason Mars would have been in canon if he had lived to the events of the game), and then experienced every bone in his body breaking from the delayed impact of the car accident he went through.

LinksEdit

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