New Caledonia (French: Nouvelle-Calédonie) is a special collectivity of France. The archipelago in the South Pacific consists of one large, mountainous island called La Grande Terre (nicknamed Le Caillou "the Pebble" by French-speaking locals) and several smaller islands: the three Loyalty Islands, the Chesterfield Islands, the Belep archipelago, and the Isle of Pines. Although the official language is French, the culture is a blend of Melanesian, European, Polynesian, Vietnamese, Chinese, Indonesian, and more. The original inhabitants, Kanak people, are the majority population in the North Province and the Loyalty Islands Province. People of European descent (Caldoches and Metropolitan French), Polynesian people (mostly Wallisians), and Southeast Asian people, as well as a few people of Pied-Noir and North African descent, are the majority in the South Province.
The Boulinda Massif in Poya, North Province, is the location of two Doors into Headquarters in World One. The first door, 1-Nou-1, was formed during the Cascade. A PPC city later grew near the location of this door, and a second, 1-Nou-2, was created to provide easier access to the city center. Naturally, hardly anyone knows about it.
Within the PPC, "New Caledonia" is almost always used metonymically to refer to "the PPC city in New Caledonia."
New Caledonia is the closest South Pacific Island to Australia and New Zealand. The mainland is divided in length by a central mountain range high enough to create a rain shadow. Most of the island, particularly the east coast, is covered by wet evergreen forests. The west coast, with its large savannahs and plains suitable for farming, is a drier area. Many ore-rich massifs, including Boulinda, are found along this coast. Nickel mining is the primary industry and is the major contributor to the high standard of living in the country.
La Grande Terre is surrounded by the New Caledonia Barrier Reef, the second largest barrier reef in the world. The protected lagoon created by this barrier reef is one of the largest in the world.
The islands are remarkably unpopulated and there are vast areas of wilderness. There are hundreds of kilometers of walking treks, camp grounds, more than 42 parks and reserves, and crystal clear rivers with sparkling waterfalls. The vibrant, clear, and rich colors are one of the first things that visitors notice when they arrive.
The climate is tropical, with a hot and humid season from November to March with temperatures between 27°C and 30°C (80-86°F), and a cooler, dry season from June to August with temperatures between 20°C and 23°C (68-73°F), linked by two short interstices. The tropical climate is strongly moderated by the oceanic influence and the trade winds that attenuate humidity, which can be close to 80%. The average annual temperature is 23°C (73°F), with historical extremes of 2.3°C (36.1°F) and 39.1°C (102.4°F).
Precipitation differs greatly within the island. The 3,000 millimeters (120 in) of rainfall recorded in Galarino are three times the average of the west coast. There are also dry periods, because of the effects of El Niño. Between December and April, tropical depressions and cyclones can cause winds to exceed a speed of 100 kilometers per hour (62 mph), with gusts of 250 kilometers per hour (160 mph) and very abundant rainfall.
The PPC City
The PPC's city in the mountains of New Caledonia doesn't exactly have a name. It is variously referred to as "New Caledonia," "New Cal," or "La Calédonie," depending on who is doing the speaking.
The original door to HQ is located in the mountains of Poya, New Caledonia, at the coordinates 21.2688° S, 165.1086° E, about 800 meters above sea level. It is designated 1-Nou-1.
With one exception (the Rue des Fleurs), streets in the city are named in honour of specific deceased and/or retired PPC personnel. Known streets are:
- In the north residential district ("American Quarter")
- In the city center
- In the south residential district ("French Quarter")
- The Rue Verra Rose (base line)
- In the north residential district ("American Quarter")
- In the city center
- In the south residential district ("French Quarter")
The city has a shopping district northwest of the town square. Many business are located there; others are scattered around the city.
- A nightclub on the southeast corner of the Rue Fait des Choses and the Rue Bart Ronson that offers "24-hour music and a dance floor that has to be seen to be believed."
- Big Murphy's store
- A weapon shop on a corner of the Rue Ella Darcy, not far from the park at Rue Ella and Rue Jay. Big Murphy himself lives in a flat close to the store.
- C.A. Milverton's
- "For All Your Discreet, Personal NEEDS."
- Chez Thorondil
- One of the first businesses opened in the town centre. It's not entirely clear what they sell, since they keep changing their minds.
- The Multiversal Sportplex
- A sporting venue that hosts boxing and other athletic events.
- The Parc Aristophane is a cricket pitch.
The city boasts a decently-sized eating district with restaurants and eateries to suit all tastes and continua. There are also a few cafés and pubs elsewhere in the city.
- Abbot's Bakery
- Specialises in Redwall-influenced pastries. Opened in 2011 HST with absurdly long lines.
- Âra ma Wayo
- The place for local Kanak cuisine, mostly vegetarian.
- Deepdelver's Tavern
- A Discworld-style establishment that serves rat-based food and does surprisingly good business.
- La Trattoria
- An Italian place. Their menu features a large pasta selection, some meat and seafood, and two or three pizzas.
- Le Cagou Ice Cream Parlor
- Named for the kagu bird, which is native to New Caledonia. It just takes the French spelling. The sign has a cartoon-y kagu bird on it, happily posing beside an ice cream sundae in a bowl. It is located northwest of the market square, toward the business district.
- A Japanese place. Also called Nakamura-zushi.
- New Calzonea
- A typical pizza place, casual and fun for kids.
- A bubble tea place northwest of the market square, near Le Cagou. In addition to normal bubble tea options, they also offer more exotic ones, such as Bleeptea, Bleepolate milk, blue milk, popping bubbles with glitter, jellies flavored with fictional fruits (e.g. shrivelfig, snozzberry, or wahoonie), or a shot of Bleepto-Dismal if you ask to "make it an Unsee Juice."
- Sabor del Mar
- A Spanish tapas place on the town square.
- Sana's Café
- A shawarma place on the Rue Acacia owned by Shafiq and Sana Beydoun.
Listed in rough north-to-south order.
- Romantic overlook
- A few dozen meters along the road from Door 1-Nou-1, a side path leads to a flat hilltop with a view of the City and, very distantly, Poya Bay.
- The Cemetery Hill
- A hill with a cliff on the south face, where the grave of Makes-Things is located. Given the return of Makes-Things and his own insistence that he never died to begin with, it's unknown just who is buried in "his" grave; agents have tried to find out, but the DIA's New Caledonia division have guards posted at the cemetery at all times to prevent whomever is buried from being exhumed.
- There is a farmer's field just south of the cemetery hill, beneath the cliff face.
- Unnamed park
- There is a park (name unknown) at the intersection of the Rue Jay Thorntree and Rue Ella Darcy.
- Agent Monty's pond is to the west of town, likely in this park.
- DIA branch office
- Headed by the Yertis.
- Mini-Balrog Adoption Centre
- A branch is located in the city.
- Parc J.R.R. Tolkien
- Also known as the Market Square; located near Door 1-Nou-2 within the city. It has picnic shelters.
- The clock tower
- Located in the city center, on the northeast corner of the intersection of the Rue Jay Thorntree and Rue des Fleurs. The clock face has a complex wheel mechanism in place of hands and counts to 24.
- The Musée des Univers Perdus
- Located on the opposite side of the city from Monty's pond and near Club Aujourd'hui. It has a plaza in front of it.
- TARDIS dock
- Includes repair facilities.
- The Arboretum
- Contains trees and plants from all over the multiverse. Located near Aujourd'hui.
- The Hospital
- Located at the intersection of the Rue Dafydd Illian and the Rue Imbolc Telyan.
- Horse rental
- A stable at the south end of town that rents a few horses for trail-riding.
Increasingly, the city in New Caledonia is being turned over to residential areas, particularly for agents with families. In contrast to the traditional response center, the city provides a reasonably stable, reasonably sane environment for children to be raised in, while still giving their parents rapid access to HQ.
The northern residential district, nicknamed the American Quarter, expanded rapidly in the early 2000s. A lack of oversight by the Wisteria resulted in the unregulated construction of American-style houses, hence the nickname. The oldest dwellings, though, are farmers' houses constructed in native style. (And possibly a few Hobbit-holes.)
The construction in the southern residential district, or French Quarter, is both more recent and more careful to blend in with French-colonial architecture such as one might find elsewhere in the former South Pacific colonies. This is fortunate, since the French Quarter is closer to the nearest populated areas of the island and more likely to be entered by accident.
- Angus MacFarlane and his daughter, Sophie
- Big Murphy
- Christianne Shieh, Eledhwen Elerossiel, and their family
- Nita Kerys
- Nyx Nightingale, Dassie Hyrax, and their children
The PPC has had a presence in the mountains of New Caledonia for some time, owing to the existence of Door 1-Nou-1. It started out as a collection of farms for growing and foraging local food sources such as yams and araucaria nuts, but expanded abruptly with the "badfic baby boom" of the early 2000s. It became a true hub of PPC life in 2008, when the League of Mary Sue Factories unleashed a macrovirus in Headquarters and HQ was put under quarantine. Agents stranded in the field were issued duplicated TARDISes and needed somewhere to park them and to meet with friends until they could return to their RCs. Some agents never went back, either stubbornly keeping their Time Lord tech or else finding that they preferred life in New Cal. As the population expanded, so did the economy, and the little farming community became a proper little city.
In Real Life, the idea of a PPC city in New Caledonia came from the random-city-generating game MyMiniCity, which explains the former grid layout. According to Huinesoron, this location was chosen because there weren't many cities there yet, so there was a chance of topping the leaderboard.[source, please!] The most densely populated part of the map is pictured at right with the center marked by a star.
Amusingly, it has the moniker Ville Fleurie, which means roughly "City of Flowers."
Clicking on any of the links below will take you to the PPC-HQ MiniCity in New Caledonia. However, you need to choose your link carefully – your first visit to the site every day (French time) will give the city +1 of the thing you click the link for. You only get one click per day, so choose wisely!
As of July 2019, we could use more industry.
If you click on a link and find that something is needed, or that something is no longer needed, then please return here and edit the above line accordingly.
- Link to increase population
- Link to increase industry
- Link to increase transport network
- Link to increase security
- Link to increase environment
- Link to increase business
- "Third Kind" by Neshomeh and Iximaz, December 30, 2017
- A PPC Agent's Guide to La Calédonie by Huinesoron, July 6, 2020
- "Attachments," Part 3, by Neshomeh and Zingenmir, February 14, 2022
- "Driftwood: Intermission" by Huinesoron, December 3, 2014
- "Always Together" (semi-canon) by Huinesoron, April 16, 2014
- The Multiverse Monitor, May 2013 edition, by Lily Winterwood
- The Multiverse Monitor, April 2013 edition, by Lily Winterwood
- "War Stories" by Tawaki, February 8, 2016
- "PPC-HQ, Nouvelle Calédonie" by Tawaki, April 8, 2008
- "And So My World Awoke," chapter 2, by Lily Winterwood, June 25, 2016
- "(Un)Intelligence," Episode 4, by SeaTurtle, April 17, 2013
- "Meeting the Exes" by Iximaz and Zingenmir, August 5, 2017
- "Ten(ish) Years Hence - A Legendary Legacy" by Zingenmir, February 22, 2021
- "Rose Of The Dark Abyss" by Lily Winterwood, August 8 2021
- "Another Day, Another Badfic" by SeaTurtle, August 31, 2012
- "(Un)Intelligence," Episode 2, by SeaTurtle, October 27, 2012
- "Shifting Gears" by Iximaz, January 16, 2018
- "Running for Love" by Tawaki, July 26, 2008
- "Help From the Past" by Huinesoron, December 10, 2013
- "Princess of Narnia" by Tawaki, August 9, 2008
- "Fallen Feathers: Nita" by Huinesoron, May 20, 2012
- "Thesuperfunnumynoseisrunnyextracrazystory" by Tawaki, September 2, 2008
- "Flight of Swans" by Huinesoron, c. May 2012
- "The First Meeting" by Tawaki, July 10, 2008
- "Cale Sèche" by Iximaz, SeaTurtle, and Zingenmir, July 19, 2015
- "Wire Tap: Christmas Special" by SeaTurtle, December 25, 2014
- "Buds & Sprouts" by Huinesoron, April 25, 2014