Within the PPC, "New Caledonia" is almost always used metonymically to refer to "the PPC city in New Caledonia."
In World One and in real life, New Caledonia (French: Nouvelle-Calédonie) is a special collectivity of France. The archipelago in the South Pacific consists of one large, mountainous island called La Grande Terre (nicknamed Le Caillou "the Pebble" by French-speaking locals) and several smaller islands: the three Loyalty Islands, the Chesterfield Islands, the Belep archipelago, and the Isle of Pines. Although the official language is French, the culture is a blend of Melanesian, European, Polynesian, Vietnamese, Chinese, Indonesian, and more. The original inhabitants, Kanak people, are the majority population in the North Province and the Loyalty Islands Province. People of European descent (Caldoches and Metropolitan French), Polynesian people (mostly Wallisians), and Southeast Asian people, as well as a few people of Pied-Noir and North African descent, are the majority in the South Province.
The Boulinda Massif in Poya, North Province, is the location of two Doors into Headquarters from World One. The first door, 1-Nou-1,[1] was formed during the Cascade. The PPC city later grew near the location of this door, and a second, 1-Nou-2, was created to provide easier access to the city center. Naturally, hardly anyone knows about it.
New Caledonia is the closest South Pacific Island to Australia and New Zealand. The mainland is divided in length by a central mountain range high enough to create a rain shadow. Most of the island, particularly the east coast, is covered by wet evergreen forests. The west coast, with its large savannahs and plains suitable for farming, is a drier area. Many ore-rich massifs, including Boulinda, are found along this coast. Nickel mining is the primary industry and is the major contributor to the high standard of living in the country.
La Grande Terre is surrounded by the New Caledonia Barrier Reef, the second largest barrier reef in the world. The protected lagoon created by this barrier reef is one of the largest in the world.
The islands are remarkably unpopulated and there are vast areas of wilderness. There are hundreds of kilometers of walking treks, camp grounds, more than 42 parks and reserves, and crystal clear rivers with sparkling waterfalls. The vibrant, clear, and rich colors are one of the first things that visitors notice when they arrive.
Climate[]
The climate is tropical, with a hot and humid season from November to March with temperatures between 27°C and 30°C (80-86°F), and a cooler, dry season from June to August with temperatures between 20°C and 23°C (68-73°F), linked by two short interstices. The tropical climate is strongly moderated by the oceanic influence and the trade winds that attenuate humidity, which can be close to 80%. The average annual temperature is 23°C (73°F), with historical extremes of 2.3°C (36.1°F) and 39.1°C (102.4°F).
Precipitation differs greatly within the island. The 3,000 millimeters (120 in) of rainfall recorded in Galarino are three times the average of the west coast. There are also dry periods, because of the effects of El Niño. Between December and April, tropical depressions and cyclones can cause winds to exceed a speed of 100 kilometers per hour (62 mph), with gusts of 250 kilometers per hour (160 mph) and very abundant rainfall.
The PPC City[]
A view over PPC New Caledonia
The PPC's city in the mountains of New Caledonia doesn't exactly have a name. It is metanymically referred to as "New Caledonia," "New Cal," or "La Calédonie," depending on who is doing the speaking.[2]
The original door to HQ is located in the mountains of Poya, New Caledonia, at the coordinates 21.2688° S, 165.1086° E, about 800 meters above sea level. It is designated 1-Nou-1.[1]
The city has a shopping district northwest of the town square.[3] Many business are located there; others are scattered around the city.
Aujourd'hui
A nightclub on the southeast corner of the Rue Fait des Choses and the Rue Bart Ronson[3] that offers "24-hour music and a dance floor that has to be seen to be believed."[4]
A cosmetics firm whose headquarters are based in the American Quarter. Its CEO is Haruko Otomebara, an elderly zashiki-warashi. It produces and supplies beauty products themed after Suvian archetypes. The company's name is a pun on the CEO's surname and the expression urameshiya うらめしや (curse you; lit. "I resent you"), associated with vengeful spirits.[9]
The city boasts a decently-sized eating district with restaurants and eateries to suit all tastes and continua. There are also a few cafés and pubs elsewhere in the city.
Abbot's Bakery
Specialises in Redwall-influenced pastries.[7] Opened in 2011 HST with absurdly long lines.[11]
Âra ma Wayo
The place for local Kanak cuisine, mostly vegetarian.[3]
Deepdelver's Tavern
A Discworld-style establishment that serves rat-based food and does surprisingly good business.[6][7]
La Trattoria
An Italian place.[7] Their menu features a large pasta selection, some meat and seafood, and two or three pizzas.[12]
Named for the kagu bird, which is native to New Caledonia. It just takes the French spelling. The sign has a cartoon-y kagu bird on it, happily posing beside an ice cream sundae in a bowl.[14] It is located northwest of the market square, toward the business district.[3]
Made in Meido-house (メイド・イン・冥土ハウス❤)
A maid café staffed by humans and non-humans, serving only one item: very bad bubble tea. The patrons indeed do not visit the place for the drink, but the high-quality costumes and charming entertainment of the waitstaff. There is apparently no gender restriction to working as a waiter here, as three male agents have taken part-time job at the café. However, it is owned by a kuchisake-onna, who does not take kindly to any of her employees being more attractive than she is.[15] The shop's name is a pun on "maid", "made" and "hell/the afterlife/the underworld".[16]
Nakamura's
Jay and Acacia putting burrs in Laurel's shoes, in the style of Mizuno Toshikata’s "Entrance to the Tea Rooms".
A Japanese place.[7] Also called Nakamura-zushi.[17] Is split between Western- and Japanese-style seating areas. The Japanese-style seating area is a small tatami room on a raised platform, with painted screens depicting ukiyo-e illustrations of Jay and Acacia's missions.[18]
Run by Yuuri (侑李) and Yuuta (勇太) Nakamura, two sushi chefs with a brotherly rivalry stemming from differing tastes in sushi-making[18]. Yuuta Nakamura, the more experimental chef, has created several types of special rolls, including:
The Luxurious Roll, which apparently pairs Glitter with natto.
The Sue-shi of the Week, which is usually patterned after a Legendary Sue or Stu. One week's Sue-shi in May 2021 was 'inspired' by "Partially Kissed Hero". It featured Glitter, gold leaf, avocado dragons, glowing red mayo, basil-wasabi sauce, and a safari hat-shaped serving board.
Nakamura's also occasionally offers karaoke at the sushi bar after dinner hours. Drinks at that time are set to happy hour pricing. The karaoke machine has a variety of songs from all over the multiverse.[18]
New Calzonea
A typical pizza place, casual and fun for kids.[14]
PPTea
A bubble tea place northwest of the market square, near Le Cagou.[3] In addition to normal bubble tea options, they also offer more exotic ones, such as Bleeptea, Bleepolate milk, blue milk, popping bubbles with glitter, jellies flavored with fictional fruits (e.g. shrivelfig, snozzberry, or wahoonie), or a shot of Bleepto-Dismal if you ask to "make it an Unsee Juice."[3]
A hill with a cliff on the south face, where the grave of Makes-Things is located.[10] Given the return of Makes-Things and his own insistence that he never died to begin with, it's unknown just who is buried in "his" grave; agents have tried to find out, but the DIA's New Caledonia division have guards posted at the cemetery at all times to prevent whomever is buried from being exhumed.
There is a farmer's field just south of the cemetery hill, beneath the cliff face.[10]
Unnamed park
There is a park (name unknown) at the intersection of the Rue Jay Thorntree and Rue Ella Darcy.[22]
Agent Monty's pond is to the west of town, likely in this park.
Also known as the Market Square; located near Door 1-Nou-2 within the city. It has picnic shelters.[8]
The clock tower
Located in the city center, on the northeast corner of the intersection of the Rue Jay Thorntree and Rue des Fleurs.[24] The clock face has a complex wheel mechanism in place of hands and counts to 24.[3]
The Appetiser is the building that forms the base of the clock tower. It and the tower are built in French-colonial style and painted yellow.[3] It houses Door 1-Nou-2, which opens onto the Rue Jay Thorntree.[25]
Across the corner from the clock tower is a small stage for musicians.[1]
Contains trees and plants from all over the multiverse. Located near Aujourd'hui.[3]
The Hospital
Located at the intersection of the Rue Dafydd Illian and the Rue Imbolc Telyan.[10]
Horse rental
A stable at the south end of town that rents a few horses for trail-riding.[3]
Residences[]
Increasingly, the city in New Caledonia is being turned over to residential areas, particularly for agents with families. In contrast to the traditional response center, the city provides a reasonably stable, reasonably sane environment for children to be raised in, while still giving their parents rapid access to HQ.
The northern residential district, nicknamed the American Quarter, expanded rapidly in the early 2000s.[3] A lack of oversight by the Wisteria resulted in the unregulated construction of American-style houses, hence the nickname.[3] The oldest dwellings, though, are farmers' houses constructed in native style.[2] (And possibly a few Hobbit-holes.)[2]
The construction in the southern residential district, or French Quarter, is both more recent and more careful to blend in with French-colonial architecture such as one might find elsewhere in the former South Pacific colonies.[2] This is fortunate, since the French Quarter is closer to the nearest populated areas of the island and more likely to be entered by accident.
The PPC has had a presence in the mountains of New Caledonia for some time, owing to the existence of Door 1-Nou-1. It started out as a collection of farms for growing and foraging local food sources such as yams and araucaria nuts,[2] but expanded abruptly with the "badfic baby boom" of the early 2000s.[3] It became a true hub of PPC life in 2008, when the League of Mary Sue Factories unleashed a macrovirus in Headquarters and HQ was put under quarantine. Agents stranded in the field were issued duplicated TARDISes and needed somewhere to park them and to meet with friends until they could return to their RCs. Some agents never went back, either stubbornly keeping their Time Lord tech or else finding that they preferred life in New Cal. As the population expanded, so did the economy, and the little farming community became a proper little city.
MyMiniCity[]
PPC-HQ MiniCity as of July 7, 2019. Not shown: Monty's pond, which got trimmed from the bottom for file size.
In Real Life, the idea of a PPC city in New Caledonia came from the random-city-generating game MyMiniCity, which explains the former grid layout. According to Huinesoron, this location was chosen because there weren't many cities there yet, so there was a chance of topping the leaderboard.[source, please!] The most densely populated part of the map is pictured at right with the center marked by a star.
Amusingly, it has the moniker Ville Fleurie, which means roughly "City of Flowers."
Clicking[]
Clicking on any of the links below will take you to the PPC-HQ MiniCity in New Caledonia. However, you need to choose your link carefully – your first visit to the site every day (French time) will give the city +1 of the thing you click the link for. You only get one click per day, so choose wisely!
As of July 2019, we could use more industry.
If you click on a link and find that something is needed, or that something is no longer needed, then please return here and edit the above line accordingly.
