Kala Jeng is an agent in the Department of Floaters. She is written by Voyd.
She and her partner/husband have the highest mission count in the Department of Floaters.
Agent Profile[]
Appearance[]
From the hips up, Kala resembles a young Romani woman. She has black eyes and her hair is dyed blonde. Below the hips, she's a giant blue-and-black scorpion. Her usual outfit is a red tank top, a skirt draped over her pedipalps, and a skull-buckle belt.
Personality[]
Kala is short-tempered and violent, and often sees insult where none was intended. As a resident of the Monster Musume universe, where humans and nonhumans don't get along perfectly, she detests the idea of a Mary Sue. To her, they're nonhumans that don't have to work for acceptance, which irritates her to no end.
Also stemming from her home continuum is a hatred of racism. Nothing angers her faster than writing someone off as inferior or "bad" simply because of species.
During one of her missions, it's revealed that, like all liminals, she becomes a living sex drive under the light of the full moon. Her attention was focused completely on getting her and Valon out of their clothes ASAP. A blow to the head and some time out of the moonlight calmed her down.
For all her violent tendencies, she truly loves her partner.
Abilities[]
Kala is a girtablilu from the Monster Musume universe; she's essentially a scorpion-centaur. She retains the proportional speed, strength and toughness of a normal scorpion, and she possesses a venomous stinger. Being stung isn't immediately fatal, however; she produces paralytic venom that interferes with muscle control. The venom is only lethal if it's applied many times in quick succession. Of course, even without stinging, she's still a seven-foot, four-hundred-pound scorpion.
Very little of this matters when she's disguised, however. She's normally wrapped up in her attempts to puzzle out a body that has eight limbs fewer than she's accustomed to. She seems to have mostly figured it out, though, and she still retains some of her great strength.
Agent History[]
In her home continuum, Kala was a chronic troublemaker who was continually needing new homestays from accidentally injuring her hosts. On her way to meet her fourth host family, she fell through a particularly large plothole and landed in HQ, right on top of Makes-Things. After this unfortunate encounter, she was dragged directed to the Marquis de Sod, and then to Response Center 211.
In August 2015, Kala and Valon got engaged, getting married in December of the same year. They are still married within the next decade.
Mission Reports[]
- "What's Going On!?"
- Kala is abruptly introduced to the PPC and her completely out-there partner.
- "I Scream for Minis"
- Kala is accused of eating Valon's food, stings him, and meets a mini.
Partnered with Valon Vance[]
- "Mission 1: Of Poorly Matched Continua" (Monster Musume x Prototype)
- In which Kala's home continuum is invaded by a Character Replacement.
- "Mission 2: Of Timeline Butchery" (Monster Musume)
- In which the canon timeline of MonMusu gets mucked up royally.
- "Mission 3: Of Scorpion's WraMOTERO!" (Watamote)
- In which Kala really needs to work on her aim.
- "Mission 4: Of Effing WHAT!?" (Harry Potter)
- In which Kala learns to hate the Ironic Overpower.
- "Mission 5: Of Frightful Red Rage" (League of Legends)
- In which Kala fears for her partner's sanity.
- "Mission 6: Of Monsters and Machines" (Five Nights at Freddy's x Godzilla) (with agents Falchion, Rashida Mafdetiti and Velociripper)
- In which Kala mistrusts a former Stu.
- "Mission 7: Of Slashy Stus" (Harry Potter)
- In which Kala cuts loose.
- "Interlude 1: Fade to Black"
- In which Kala speaks the truth.
- "Mission 8: Of Stus Gone By" (My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic), with agents Rina Dives and Zeb
- In which Kala provides moral support.
- "Mission 9: Of Guilty Pleasures and Utter Tripe" (The Inheritance Cycle and Twilight, with Dawn McKenna and Kozar)
- In which Kala goes moon-mad.
- "Ten Years Hence: Seren the Dragon Rider"
- Kala and her husband visit a new Dragon Rider.
- "Mission 10: Attack on Badfic" (Attack on Titan), with agents Chakkik, Rayner Blitzkrieg and Evangeline von Lilith
- In which Valon and Kala get separated.
- "Mission 11: Extraterrestrial" (Mario and Doctor Who, with Rina Dives)
- In which Kala gets a headache.
- "Mission 12: Just Testing" (Warframe and Five Nights at Freddy's, with agent Desdendelle)
- In which Kala throws her weight around.
- "Interlude 2: ISHFWILF"
- In which Kala breaks down.
- "Interlude 3: It's a Beautiful Thing"
- In which Kala takes a nap.
- "Interlude 4: All My Life", with The Aviator, The Notary, and Falchion
- They do.
- "Mission 13: Why Would You Quit?" (Harry Potter and Five Nights at Freddy's)
- In which Kala stops questioning things.
- "Mission 14: ...in the Wind" (Dust: An Elysian Tail)
- In which Kala teases her husband.
- "Mission 15: Every Girl Crazy" (Ouran High School Host Club x Harry Potter) (cameo)