Ice

Notice from the Sunflower Official:

This agent and his partner are currently being investigated by the DIO and the DIA for behavior contrary to the spirit of the PPC.

The charges against them include, but are not limited to:

• Sueish descriptions: ["ebony hair"; "Ice’s eyes, a beautiful and impossible blue, like a mile-deep lake set in a glacier, focused on that length of throat and dilated fiercely."]
• Unacceptable assassination methods: ["Come on, Ice, the Sue is about to appear any minute, and I know you can hear me. I thought you wanted to kill her! Look, I’ll give you the Sue and her boyfriend. You can torture them, dissect them, drain them, rape them, it doesn’t matter to me."]
• Contempt for the Flowers: ["I’ll cover for you with the Plants. They won’t know you didn’t go by the book. Please, just don’t leave me here."]
• Sexually Assaulting PPC Staff:

["Ack!" the young man squawked as strong hands caught him by the scruff of the neck and the seat of the pants and hauled him very un-gently back into the office.

"Ow," Gabrielle exclaimed as Ice’s hasty departure from beneath her caused her to crumple to the floor.

"And who, exactly, are you supposed to be?" Ice purred as the slim human struggled in his grip.

"Ice…."

"L… let go?" the boy pleaded, and Ice smiled slowly, the wide and wicked smile of a predator looking upon a much-anticipated meal. The boy turned pale.

"Ice."

"Tell me," the white-haired immortal murmured as he adjusted his grip on the boy, fingers knotting in his hair and pulling back, hard. The boy was forced to crane his neck, exposing his throat. Ice’s eyes, a beautiful and impossible blue, like a mile-deep lake set in a glacier, focused on that length of throat and dilated fiercely.

Gabriella grabbed the boy from behind and yanked him out of Ice’s grasp. His fingers failed to uncurl and the poor human yelped as a fistful of silken black hair was torn from his head. "ICE! Cut it out, this is Makes-Things!" she protested, eyes flashing with anger as she dragged the boy to a safe distance and leaned him up against the consol.]

• Lack of an appropriate sense of humor. [See all previous excerpts.]

Their missions have been quarantined from the rest of the spin-offs and removed from the Complete List of PPC Fiction until further notice. The agents themselves have been stripped of their rank and placed in holding cells. Should the DIO and DIA rule against them, they will be decommissioned. Thank you for your time.

Profile

Agent Ice, full name Irilisan, is an assassin in the Department of Mary Sues, Vampire Diaries Division. He is partnered with Gabriella (who is also his creator).

Ice is an immortal vampire and a reformed godplayer. He joined the PPC because it was something interesting to do.

Ice has a bad habit of scaring people with the fact that he is a vampire and could drink people's blood, if he chose to; but he doesn't actually do so (except, of course, in the case of Sues).

Ice is the long-term lover of Agent Dorian.

Gabriella and Ice are assigned to RC #8123.

Mission Reports

Home: Gabriella-n-Ice

Partnered with Gabriella

• "Introducing Our Heroes" (Nightworld)
• "Shi Ne Maria!", Part 1, Part 2 (unfinished) (Vampire Diaries)
• "New light, old plot" (Nightworld x Forbidden Game)