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Fizz R the Bizarre ("It's not a nickname!") is a physician in the Disturbing Acts of Violence Department's Medical Division. He was originally written by Katharine, but has since been written by Huinesoron.

Fizz R, known affectionately as "the Fizz" by his colleagues, is a reedy middle-aged man with unkempt gray hair and large glasses. He specializes in treating canon characters who have been subjected to, well, disturbing acts of violence in fanfiction. Since canon characters can't truly die in fanfic, but only be made to think they're dead, a job can start with patching up your run-of-the-mill disemboweling and extend all the way to gluing on a severed head. He also treats DAVD agents if they get hurt, but the no-dying rule doesn't extend to them.

He works in a large laboratory in HQ proper rather than in the basement with the rest of the DAVD. The lab has gleaming metal cabinets, a pair of metal tables, and strange devices situated haphazardly all over the place—in Dour K's words, like something out of a bad Frankenstein movie. Like the Medical Department proper, he has access to a variety of advanced tools, such as dermal regenerators from the Star Trek continuum and a white, viscous fluid that can affix severed body parts within minutes.

Fizz R is likeable and almost perpetually chipper in spite of his gruesome duties. However, he can turn snappish when necessary to get a subordinate moving, and he has recently been caught up in the rivalry between his Head of Division, the Spirit Tree, and the ambitious Elder Evil Tree who directs the Intel Division. A particularly heated fracas involved an axe-battle in the cafeteria, for which both parties were severely scolded by the Big Thorn. Fizz R seems to take the matter in stride, and once remarked that "axes were as good a way as any" to achieve conflict resolution.


Listed in chronological order according to when they take place on the HQ Standard Timeline, as near as can be determined.

  • "Killer in the Dark" (The Lord of the Rings), Agent Dour K (DAVD), c. December 2002
    • Dour K visits "Killer in the dark," wherein she must face many dead people (some of whom don't exist), a psychotic Elf, and plotholes galore. WARNING: Contains torture, murder, and Katharine's sick and twisted sense of humor. *nasty smirk*
  • "DAVD, 2009"
    • Or, what happens when your department gets decimated and nobody cares.