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Elaina Thyme, currently part of the Department of Bad Slash, joined the PPC in April 2009.

Agent Profile[]


Elaina arrived at the PPC after wishing on a star for two months straight that she would find a purpose in life, preferably one which allowed her to lead an interesting life and drop out of college. She fell through a plothole on her way to English class and was immediately dropped into an MST of the Legendary Badfic "Agony in Pink," along with her future partner Sarah Vym and twin researchers for the Department of Mary Sue Experiments and Research, Cocoa and Powder Puff. Through some bizarre bending of the space-time continuum, Sarah does not seem to have experienced this yet, and Elaina has given up attempting to figure this out.

She came from a wholly unremarkable middle-class family in western Washington State and was in many ways her parents' problem child. She had little ambition and less motivation and seemed set for a dead-end career as an office worker. In many ways, it was a relief to everyone when she fell into HQ.


Elaina is short and curvy, with black hair which she keeps in braids and dark brown skin. Her eyes too are black. She likes to wear eccentric jewelry, which she removes on missions, and has her ears pierced several times. On missions, she carries a backpack containing her exorcism supplies, a music-playing device, reading material, Bleeprin and Bleepka, and any gadgets she needs. She also has possession of the remote activator, since Sarah tends to be absent-minded and forget it places, which is bad.


Elaina is more balanced then her partner, and presents basically the same personality to everyone she meets: confident almost to the point of being cocky, friendly, and rather snarky when she's annoyed. She has never been dragged down to FicPsych, much to her delight, and lacks the homicidal urges that characterize many of the other PPC agents, including her partner. She carries a small pocket knife just in case, but has never yet had to actually use it.

Elaina, as the more levelheaded of the pair, is most often loaned out to other departments, usually the Department of Implausible Crossovers. She would much rather work in DBS, as she prefers exorcisms to neuralyzing, but will, of course, do what she is asked to do. After all, Elaina does want to keep her job. She was rather traumatized when her previous partner, Agent Daphne Flamewrite, defected from the PPC to stay in a Harry Potter fic and become Lucius Malfoy's sex toy. Daphne was later removed by force from the fic and sent to be an inpatient at FicPsych, but Elaina is still fairly scarred by the whole thing, and is mistrustful of any new partner. She and Sarah clashed originally, but have since learned to get along and even respect each other's skills.

Elaina has an obsession with blood, especially her own, and the extent of this fascination can scare even her. Her method of coping with badfic is to bite into herself until she bleeds, a habit which disgusts and disturbs her partner. Elaina is starting to get concerned about this, but has decided that, really, it's no worse than the obsession some of her fellow agents have with Bleeprin-derived products and probably healthier as well. She's also a masochist, actually preferring the more disgusting, appalling fics. Sarah is of the opinion that she is utterly, completely insane, and Elaina has to agree. Still, it does not seem to have hurt her too much thus far.

Mission Reports[]

Home: Response Center #1134

Partnered with Sarah Vym[]

  • "Ice" (Fruits Basket)
    • Sarah and Elaina exorcise the characters of Fruits Basket and Elaina puts her foot down.