Cadmar

Cadmar is a human agent who joined in late 2010. His missions are all currently in various states of being written, waiting for him to his author to get off his lazy butt and write.

Backstory
He is reluctant to speak of his past before joining up, though he occasionally slips up. He fell through a plothole into HQ, right into Luxury's RC, where there were many a seduction attempt and a good deal of innuendo before he could get Luxury to explain what was going on. After she led him to the Marquis de Sod (which took a long time because she kept trying to wrangle him into various RCs), he made the mistake of asking to see if he could try out each type of main mission, to see which he preferred. He was then assigned to an agent and given one mission each of implausible crossover, bad slash, and Mary Sue (in that order). After completing them, he was assigned to Maria and Mark in the Department of Floaters.

Contrary to a great deal of others, he doesn't have much of a problem with Luxury (provided he can pay attention and not say the stock response of "yes"). He also enjoys the room-clearing she can induce. He prefers a happy bouncy person to a broody person any day.

Appearance
Cadmar is 6'0" and is slightly overweight due to a caffeine addiction. He has brown eyes and brown hair which looks very messy. His usual attire is a baggy black T-shirt, camo pants with a lot of pockets, a backpack, and a black bandanna. He also always has a pair of headphones with him, as he enjoys music greatly. His arms and legs have some scars due to the odd jobs he frequently did.

During his second training mission, he was possessed by a slash wraith and grew shark teeth due to bad phrasing. He has since enjoyed using them whenever possible, finding no reason to get rid of them. The occasional biting his own lip is easily solved by a trip to Medical, provided the blood loss doesn't kick in first. He is fond of carrying his machetes with him at all times.

He is now a she, having been genderbent during a fouled-up mission in the Harry Potter canon. She is roughly the same height, and a bit thinner. After an incident in which she was temporarily Sued, she (briefly) had a large amount of scarring on her stomach and the back of her neck, but had them removed. She kept a Celtic knot design tattoo the Sue got through torture, and has had it expanded down both arms to her elbows.

Personality
He is already quite psychotic despite having just started, mainly due to overexposure to badfics, and a very unstable and chaotic upbringing. His Her psychoticness has only increased since being tortured and genderbent. A fondness for a rather large cleaver is a side-effect. He enjoys having little morals and using violence to accomplish missions. Despite being this way, he is a friendly person. Mostly. He enjoys puns, despite how bad they may be, and his sense of humor is dark at times. He has shown jealousy for Florestan, who is in a relationship with Maria.

Though he tries not to tempt the Ironic Overpower or flaunt the Laws of Narrative Comedy, a lot of the problems that befall him are usually of his own doing, even if he doesn't know it at the time. A perfect example would be his friendship with Luxury, who is convinced that he likes her, because he momentarily forgot that he was with her and she takes nudity as a proposition. He is oblivious to this completely.

Pets and Minis
He very happily owns Brandyduck, the mini-Balrog. He first acquired Brandyduck when he accidentally stumbled upon the Mini Adoption Center while looking for the office of the Queen Anne's Lace. He can usually be found traveling with Brandyduck.

He is the proud owner of the first (and currently only) Jurassic Park mini, a mini–Tyrannosaurus Rex named Jurasic park, which he got from his third training mission.

He also owns Tiel'c, the mini-Unas.

Missions Reports
Home: RC #481,516,234,277

Training

 * Training Mission 1: "Pillows, and Zats, and Sues, Oh My!" (Lord of the Rings x Star Wars), with Agents Cali and Miah (DMS)
 * Miah and Cali take on new recruit Cadmar for a training mission in a crossover.
 * Training Mission 2: "Saccharinely Sweet" (Harry Potter), with Agent Luxury (DBS)
 * Cadmar gets a toothache in "Sweet Candy."
 * Training Mission 3: Dino Hunters (Jurassic Park), with Agent Orken 7861 (DMS - Sci-Fi/Steampunk)
 * Agents Cadmar and Orken 7861 take to the jungles of Jurassic Park to stop a Stu who violates the laws of biology and decency, and a Sue seductress.

Partnered with Maria and Mark

 * Interlude 1: "Agent Intro"
 * Cadmar and Mark are assigned to their partners, but must first brave HQ to get there. Maria lounges around having a fun time.
 * Mission 1: "PPC for Eva!" (Lord of the Rings)
 * Cadmar, Mark, and Maria tackle their first Sue, and become best friends foreva!
 * Mission 2: "The Reason Cadmar Can't Like Things" (Deltora Quest)
 * Cadmar, Mark, and Maria take on a short and confusing Deltora Quest fic.
 * Mission 3: "Dirty Rotten Cowards" (Harry Potter x Stargate Atlantis), with Agents Florestan and Eusabius (DIC)
 * Agents Maria Nightingale and Mark Sienna team up with Florestan and Eusabius to track down a wimpy Harry Potter.
 * Interlude 2: "Relationship Upgrade"
 * Mark finds a new friend, Cadmar gets jealous, Eusabius is attacked by minis, and Florestan and Maria get a relationship upgrade.
 * Interlude 3: "Truth or Dare"
 * PPC style!
 * Mission 4: "Dragon Lady" (Harry Potter), with Agent Miah (DMS)
 * Mark, Maria, Cadmar, and Miah face Heather Draconius, the worst jerk!warrior!Sue any of them have ever faced, and deal with the consequences of poor planning and poorly maintained equipment.
 * Interlude 4: "Picking up the Pieces"
 * In which the aftermath of the "Dragon Lady" mission is dealt with.
 * Mission 5: "Blinded by the Blight" (Zombieland), Cadmar with Agent Lucius Sievert (DF)
 * Agents Lucius and Cadmar go to Zombieland to spot a bad slash and character killing.
 * Mission 6: "Optional" (Harry Potter x Sanctuary), with Agents Cali and Miah (DMS)
 * Miah "requests" another mission with Cadmar, Mark, and Maria.
 * Interlude 5: "Truth or Dare 2"
 * Mark Siena, Maria Nightingale, and Cadmar invite Miah and Cali to play Truth or Dare again! And this time, Florestan stumbles in, and ends up getting roped into it. Awkwardness ensues.
 * Mission 7: "Plague of Stus" (Mass Effect x Fallout), with Agent Florestan (DIC)
 * In which Mark, Maria, and Cadmar team up with Florestan to kill off a Fallout Stu who's stuck in the Mass Effect continuum.
 * Interlude 6: "Bonding Time"
 * Florestan and Maria Nightingale take their relationship to the next level.
 * Mission 8: "The Agents Who Cried Space Wolf" (Stargate SG-1), with Agents Orken 7861 and Thomas Greenwall (DMS - Sci-Fi/Steampunk)
 * Agents Orken and Thomas try to take on a blue wolf with quills... FROM SPACE! Agents Cadmar and Maria drop in to lend a hand.
 * Interlude 7: "Birthday Party"
 * Cadmar, Drew, and Lucius have a party! Drunken shenanigans ahoy!
 * Mission 9: "Sateda" (Stargate Atlantis), Cadmar with Agent Miah (DMS)
 * After Cali and Cadmar's first date, Miah interrogates Cadmar on her intentions, all while they try to deal with the youngest Sue to date.
 * Interlude 8: "McKaLoy's Fortnight"
 * What could possibly happen when a McKay-based mini-Wraith takes apart the RA? Miah and Cadmar arrive a bit late from the "Sateda" mission.
 * Interlude 9: "Christmas!"
 * It's Christmas for Maria, Mark, and Cadmar! However, it wouldn't be Christmas without friends, embarrassing stories, and heartfelt gifts!
 * Mission 10: "Against All Odds" (Stargate Atlantis), Cadmar with Agent Cali (DMS)
 * Cadmar visits Cali as he is recovering from injuries from his previous mission ("Re-run"), and they get assigned a fic where AU is only the beginning of the description. Read on to discover whether Cadmar's bedroom walls are covered with messages written in blood, what color Cali's eyes are, and what happens when one of the SGA guys gets pregnant.

MSTs

 * "My Inner Life"
 * Chapter One
 * Chapter Two
 * Chapter Three
 * Chapter Four
 * Chapter Five
 * Chapter Six
 * Chapter Seven
 * Chapter Eight