Elms

Elms is a nurse in the Department of Fictional Psychology. She is written by Neshomeh, but may be borrowed with permission.

Appearance
Elms is five foot six and lean, but shapely. She has strong arms, all the better with which to carry heavy trays of drinks and toss unruly patrons out into the gutter&mdash;not that she has much call to do either anymore, but still.

She has brown eyes and blonde hair with generous curls that bob against her cheeks when she moves abruptly. She has also taken to wearing corrective lenses since joining the PPC. She favors blue frames.

Her mode of dress is a mix between "bar wench" and "pirate." She likes being able to wear trousers instead of skirts, but still prefers corsets to bras.

Personality
Elms is a rough-and-tumble, ready-for-anything kind of gal. Shame is an alien concept to her, and she's always ready to have a laugh at anyone's expense, including her own. She enjoys all things associated with the word "bawdy." She learned to fight in the Generic Tavern where she used to work, and she has a knack for wielding blunt, cast-iron cookware offensively. When speaking, it is not uncommon for her to reference gaming terms, such as dump stats, nat-20s, will saves, etc.

Her style of therapy is very much that of the stereotypical bartender: give 'em a drink or two to let them relax and loosen the tongue, let 'em cry on your shoulder if necessary, but keep your distance and don't go poking around personal territory where you're not wanted. Agents who want to unburden themselves in a casual, slightly alcohol-scented atmosphere would do well to visit her.

History
Elms hails from a generic Dungeons & Dragons–based fantasyverse where she was an NPC tavern wench. Her full name, laid on her by an overexcited GM with a fondness for arbitrary alliteration, is Elmira Serena Sylphia Saffron. Once she gained a say in the matter, she quickly abandoned it in favor of a catchy abbreviation.

Exactly how she came to the PPC is unknown, but it's likely that some adventurers did something stupid to screw with the fabric of reality. Perhaps they opened a faulty dimension door in the cellar while trying to remove the ubiquitous rat infestation. This is the kind of shenanigans adventurers get up to.

In any case, Elms stuck around to see what she could make of herself in a new environment. In the process, she befriended the FicPsych staff and, since she had nothing better to do, was shanghaied into helping out. She stayed on when she found herself a niche there, and became a full-time nurse.

Appearances
Home: Department of Fictional Psychology


 * "Gestalt Therapy"
 * In which Elms' skill with cast iron comes in handy during the 2008 Macrovirus Epidemic and Sue Invasion.
 * "PPC Bleepka Bar" (RP)
 * In which she gives Jenni a hard time over her taste in men.
 * "Ten Years Hence: Henry"
 * In which she is still around.
 * AHAIRQL Season Two:
 * Recruitment: "Team Physical Therapy"
 * In which Elms is all for some good old-fashioned exercise.
 * Round 1: "Physical Therapy vs. Blast Hardcheese"
 * In which she meets her match in Gall Bonecrusher.