Embryo Extraction Kit



The Embryo Extraction Kit or EEK, colloquially known as the debugger, is used by the Department of Improbabilities, Department of Bad Slash, and any other needy departments to correct uncanonical pregnancies, especially MPreg.

The EEK uses matter transfer technology to move an embryo or fetus from the uncanonical parent to a suitable receiver. It's a rather unwieldy affair consisting of two needles, resembling the bug removal devices in The Matrix, each on one end of a long, clear tube. One end goes into the navel of the pregnant character. The other goes into the navel of the natural mother or a surrogate if one is available and willing; otherwise, the EEK may be paired with a special tank or jar that receives the discorporated fetus, or directly with an artificial womb. There is a "large, blue, candy-like button" at the receiving end of the device. This is pressed to initiate the matter transfer, which looks like glitter flying through the tube accompanied by a squelching sound. It is perfectly painless and efficient.

Viable fetuses removed by the extractor are taken to the Nursery for rearing within artificial wombs (sometimes referred to as "uterine replicators"). If a fetus has undergone an unnaturally fast gestation or is otherwise biologically incompatible with life outside of a badfic, it may be placed in an Illogical Incubator.

Use in Missions
Listed in chronological order according to when they take place on the HQ Standard Timeline, as near as can be determined.


 * "Son of..." (The Lord of the Rings), Agent Dee (DBS - HP) with Agent Alec Troven (DI), April/May 2004
 * Possibly the EEK's first appearance. The agents remove an unborn Aragorn from inside Legolas and put him inside Gilraen, where he belongs.
 * "Baby bump, hormones, & tennis" (Real Person Fic), Agents Trojanhorse and Paddlebrains (DBS), July 6, 2008
 * The agents relieve tennis player Roger Federer of an Mpreg fetus and transfer it to adoptive mother Pads.
 * "Ethuil'waew" (The Lord of the Rings), Agent Oscar Henson (DBS - Mpreg) with Agents Trojanhorse and Paddlebrains (DBS), October 2008
 * The debugger is paired with an artificial womb: a fluid-filled bubble that becomes opaque when occupied.
 * "Wrong" (The Chronicles of Narnia), Agents Fritz Sorgebrunnen and Silas (DF), August 2009
 * The debugger is paired with a foot-long plastic tank that keeps the fetus in the form of swirling glitter.
 * "You Now Have 46 Hours," Part 1, Part 2 (Sherlock Holmes), Agents David Kelok and Unger (APD), September 2010
 * Kelok uses a novel combination of an EEK with a Sue Phantom Containment Unit (read: a large jar) to remove a nexus of Suefluence from Sherlock Holmes' leg.
 * "Not Dead Yet" (Stargate SG-1), Agents Kaliel/Maeryn (DBS) with Agent Miah Arthur (DMS), October 2010
 * The agents remove an embryo from Samantha Carter to a specially prepared jar.